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Platitudes and Sentiments

Platitudes and Sentiments …our lives are full of them. All one has to do is walk into any Hallmark Store and there before you is an endless variety to choose from. We no longer have to make a choice of what to say for any occasion because someone in a harshly lit cubical somewhere has done it for us. All we need to do is pick it up and stick our name on it and poof…sentiment delivered.

The problem I have is that I could visit a thousand stores and still not be able to find the appropriate one for my own life.

“What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger”… might be a good choice but you can’t kill something that’s already dead, so does that make me stronger? No…it just makes me one more soul left behind.

“Keep your chin up”…possibly another good choice but doesn’t keeping your chin pointed skyward just increase your chances of drowning in the storm?

“When one door closes another one opens”…this one always puzzled me…maybe because it seems as if all the opening doors just lead me to one greater disappointment.

“It’s always darkest before the dawn”…very true but when does the sun actually rise…I have been waiting for it for years now and I think I have just grown accustom to the darkness.

“Never judge a person until you’ve walked a mile in their shoes”…one of my favorites actually but one that most of us never live by. Perhaps it’s because we know that to walk in someone else’s shoes for even a moment will require us to put aside who we are and none of us can truly be that unselfish, even for a moment.

My life has been what I made it and I understand that and accept it, but that does not mean that it’s what I planned. I have lived for others, in one way or another most of my life and in doing so I lost so much of me along the way. Now at 52, my choices as well as my own future is limited. I don’t have the time, wisdom or strength to start over and yet I must find a way to do just that.

The last 6 years I feel as if I died with my chin in the air as the doors closed in the darkness. Hows that for a platitude?  What possible sentiment is there for someone who lost parents, a brother, children, friends, their security, stability, livelihood and finally their home? Is there a platitude to cover that?

Is there anyone willing to “walk a mile in these shoes”?… I doubt it and honestly I wouldn’t wish that on my worst enemy. I could not inflict this much pain on any other soul.

I guess in the end the only thing that truly fits is….(insert platitude or sentiment here)

 

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Copyright 2012 Theresa Allen

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Tossing Time to the Wind

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    There is really only one thing I wish I hadn’t thrown away and that was the time I could have spent with my parents and my brothers. Because I was so caught up in my own life I didn’t realize then just how precious that time would turn out to be. It’s the one thing we can never re-coop so once it is gone not only is the time itself gone but the opportunity to make the memories we could have made had we used it wisely. Now both my parents have passed on and my brothers are distant because of family issues that never were resolved. I often sit and wonder how different my life would have been had I made other choices when I had the chance and not a day goes buy that I don’t miss just having the time to spend with each of them. Now I find that having time for my family is the most important thing I own and I treasure every moment I get to spend with them. I never want any of them to look back and think as I do…”if only I had”. There is so much in life that we take for granted and when we are young we always think there will always be a tomorrow but none of us are ever promised that so if we miss a chance to just spend some time with those we love because we believe we can always do it tomorrow we may just end up wishing someday we had never thrown away that time.

    ❤ love you all and miss you every day!